Ever since Halloween kicked
off the slasher boom in the fall of 1978, holiday hack-em-ups have part and
parcel of the horror genre. Killer Santas and snowmen and garden variety jilted
lovers have sliced, stabbed, and shish-kabobbed their ways through every imaginable
day of celebration. Some are truly godawful, like the Thanksgiving romp Blood
Rage (1987) – it’s not cranberry sauce! – while others like Bloody
Birthday (1981) are truly inspired. And of course, many grab at any
occasion at all to set a horror film in; from the surprisingly great (Prom Night
[1980]) to the unbearably wacky (Graduation Day [1981]).
So
let’s crank the A/C and beat the heat with 10 Holiday Slashers!
10)
X-Ray (1982) dir. Boaz Davidson
This Cannon Films-produced slice of
weirdness was also titled Hospital Massacre, and like many slasher films
of the time, is set around Valentine's Day for absolutely no reason. It centers
on a woman who is being stalked by a maniac from her past in a hospital where
nobody will let her leave. Sure, it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, but the
kills are bloody and the cinematography echoes that of Dario Argento, plus the
movie goes well with those gross candy hearts.
9)
New Year’s Evil (1980) dir. Emmett Alston
This is one of those unusual
slashers that focuses on adult victims instead of hapless teens. A tv news
anchor who is somewhat of a local celebrity finds herself the target of a
murderous maniac in the lead-up to her much-anticipated New Year’s Eve special.
The film is another Cannon Films production and has all the superficial glitz and
zaniness one expects from the famously low-budget 80s movie house. It also has
a halfway clever title which, in all honesty, is probably the only real reason
for its existence.
8)
Christmas Evil (1980) dir. Lewis Jackson
Speaking of convenient names, here’s
another one! The difference here is that Christmas Evil is actually very
good. It’s not your typical slice-n-dice either, saving most of the red stuff
for the very end. It centers on Harry, a middle-aged man obsessed with
Christmas due to seeing his parents getting it on as a kid while his dad was
dressed up as Santa Claus. Naturally, Harry works at a toy factory by day, and
pretends he’s Santa by night. No possible way that could end poorly, right? The
film has obvious parallels to Scorsese’s Taxi Driver (1976), but never steals
outright and hard-earns its suspense. An underseen gem in a Santa suit.
7)
Terror Train (1980) dir. Roger Spottiswoode
Jamie Lee Curtis is stuck on a college
costume party train on New Year's Eve with a killer who wants revenge on her
and her friends for a prank gone wrong. The claustrophobic nature of the train
cars adds quite a bit of tension to this one, and the gore is well-done. The
film also sidesteps a number of clichés by having the murderer switch disguises
regularly, adding an anything-can-happen element to the proceedings.
6)
Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984) dir. Charles E. Sellier Jr.
PUNISH!!! This loony, thoroughly
enjoyable cinematic disaster sailed straight into infamy when it was
unceremoniously pulled from theaters after backlash from Conservative Killjoy
Karens who protested its depiction of a killer in a Santa outfit. Never mind
that it was hardly the first flick to try that particular gimmick (Christmas
Evil was released four years earlier, and it wasn’t the first either) but Silent
Night, Deadly Night is pretty damned clear that it’s not actually Santa
going around murdering half the town. No, no, that would be Billy, a young man
who saw his parents murdered by a criminal in a Santa outfit as a child, was
subsequently abused by the mother superior at his orphanage, and now finds his
fragile mental state thoroughly pulverized with a potato masher when he’s asked
to play Santa Claus at the toy store he works for. Naturally, he goes about
deciding that everyone is naughty and punishes them severely with an axe, Christmas
lights, a box cutter, and even trophy antlers! Naughty…
5)
Jack Frost (1997) dir. Michael Cooney
This movie features the world’s most
pissed-off snow cone! That’s right folks, it’s the one with the mutant killer
snowman! Not to be confused with the children’s movie of the same name (dear
God, please don’t show this to your kids… without making popcorn), Jack
Frost is your definitely normal example of a movie where a serial killer
gets splashed with some experimental whatever and becomes a really homicidal
snowman with a penchant for cringy one-liners. It has Christmas tree crucifixion.
It has oatmeal with antifreeze. It has the sex scene with the most layers of
clothing ever! It’s almost perfect, is what I’m saying.
4)
My Bloody Valentine (1981) dir. George Mihalka
Harry Warden was trapped in a mineshaft
collapse and went nuts, cannibalizing those trapped with him before he was
rescued. Then he killed a bunch of people he thought were responsible on
Valentine’s Day. Twenty years later, the murders have begun again. Is Harry
Warden back? My Bloody Valentine is one of the absolute best one-off
slashers out there. The miner’s outfit is remarkably scary, the gore is top notch,
and the Canadian-ness of the whole thing is just… very Canadian. Get your heart
broken!
3)
Friday the 13th (1980) dir. Sean Cunningham
Is Friday the 13th
actually a holiday? Well, it’s a day, and people think it means something, so I
guess it counts? You know this one. A bunch of teens are trying to get Camp
Crystal Lake ready to reopen for the first time in years, but someone doesn’t
want them too. In fact, the don’t want it bad enough that they start picking
off the kids one by one. Everything about the film works, from the score by
Harry Manfredini to the famous gore effects by Tom Savini (and any other rhyme
I can make with “ini”). There’s a reason it spawned an entire franchise. It’s
got a death curse!
2)
Black Christmas (1974) dir. Bob Clark
Perhaps the best Christmas movie
ever made (and one of the greatest horror films ever by far) Black Christmas
set the template for the slasher format to come. This rather simple tale of a
sorority house being stalked by a killer as everyone gets ready to go home for
the holidays is a masterpiece of suspense and terror. Director Bob Clark makes
use of killer point-of-view shots years before Sam Raimi did the same in The
Evil Dead (1981), and employs what may be the first instance of “the call
is coming from inside the house” plot device, now so common in the genre. Add
to that some incredible performances by Olivia Hussey, Keir Dullea, John Saxon,
and Margot Kidder, and you have one unmissable experience. Oh, and turtles.
1)
Halloween (1978) dir. John Carpenter
Of course, Halloween is
number one! Did you really think I’d leave it out? Not only is John Carpenter’s
defining work the whole reason for the early slasher avalanche AND the first to
set the pattern for holiday-themed slashers as well… it’s quite simply one of
the best movies ever made! You all know what it’s about, but for good measure
let’s just say Michael Myers escapes his mental institution, puts on a Captain
Kirk mask, and goes about killing some babysitters and chasing Jamie Lee
Curtis. The camerawork is bar none, the music is iconic, the pacing, editing,
acting, and scripting are all pitch perfect. And the atmosphere is unequalled.
It’s a perfect film and deserves to top any list it appears on. Full stop.
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